follow me on Twitter

    Thursday, July 24, 2008

    Last HOPE conference (Hackers on Planet Earth) Part 3

    The Last HOPE conference (Hackers on Planet Earth) in NYC 2008

    Part 3 (Friday)

    Last that day, another notable presentation included “Hacking the Mind, Hacking the Body: Pleasure.” I went to it because the title piqued my curiosity and I demanded my husband go with me, but before the presentation started, he slipped out to go get some Jolt and, according to his story, there were so many people in the room when he returned that he couldn’t get back in because the room was beyond max. capacity. So, in turn, he left me surrounded shoulder-to-shoulder in a room containing 99.9% hacker guys in which a woman was discussing some tech about cyber sex and a lot of things I had never before heard of. I had the pleasure of sitting behind two hulking Federal agents (it was so obvious—who is teaching you guys to “blend in” with the natives?!) who, in their tight golf shirts and ironed khaki shorts, were giggling like kids. Every time the presenter said something about anatomy or someone from the audience asked a question, they’d double over laughing and make critical comments about computer geeks.

    Did you guys know that you had an entertained audience behind you who found your antics hilarious? At least your packing heat requirement was not fulfilled with an American-touristy fanny pack as you did in previous years, but if you’re the new face of the FBI, we’re lost. I can see it now on the FBI’s Employment page: “Now hiring tough-guy goons for the anti-cyber crimes squad. Must [not] be able to blend in with the tech crowd, must be able to bench press over 300 lbs., wear tight t-shirts to show off your top-rate physique, and have a history in high school of bullying geeks and, subsequently, were snowed by those same geeks in college math and science classes who refused to tutor you.”

    If the FBI is as keen on recruiting the smart people at hacker conferences like Def Con and HOPE as they say they are, they are not projecting the most positive image of what it’s like to work for the anti-cyber crimes squad.

    And then, after midnight and some lounging in the hammocks listening to techno music on the 2nd floor, I went to sleep unsoundly amidst the not-comforting-to-a-Mainer city noises.


    Anonymous said...

    Wow. That is awesome. I wish I could have seen them, but, standing up on that stage with bright lights in the dark, I could barely see beyond the 3rd row.

    Wish someone would have played a very visible game of "Spot the Fed".

    Thanks for the coverage! Your blog had the first coverage of my talk I found!

    Happy Hacking!

    Anonymous said...

    Your fella wasn't lying; I stepped out of the room five minutes in, and security were already turning people away at the door to uphold the fire code.

    Deano252 said...

    I did notice some feds walking around but it didn't seem as much as Hope 6. This may be a good thing because I really didn't want to see Jello Biafra moon the crowd again. I couldn't get up to the Talk as well because of capacity issues.

    Tiffany Strauchs Rad said...

    If c4bl3fl4m3 gives the talk again at the Next Hope, they should give her the biggest room.